Invisible Children

Today at school, we had an assembly about the terrible conflict happening in northern Uganda. We watched an hour and a half film in which three young (early twenties) Americans went to Africa in search of a good story, and found terror and devastation. The result was a documentary called Invisible Children: Rough Cut, and it has inspired millions.

www.invisiblechildren.com

The LRA, or Lord's Resistance Army, is a terrorist faction in Uganda that, in essence, wants to overthrow the Ugandan government. For approximately twenty years, the LRA, led by Joseph Kony, has been murdering innocent civilians and destroying any chance for hope. But because their support has been dwindling, the main recruits of the LRA are children ages 7 to 14. In fact, 90% of the soldiers are this age. Most of these children are orphans because their parents have been murdered by the LRA, or have otherwise been separated from them. So, children are forced to flee their homes, commuting at night to find new safe places to hide, some making it to displacement camps, others left to fend for themselves. If they don't make it, they face abduction, torture, brainwashing, and murder. And even if they make it to the camps, the LRA conducts raids and could potentially attack anywhere at anytime.

Needless to say, I was captivated and horrified by this film. I nearly cried at the injustice of it. They showed a segment where the camera went over a filthy hospital floor. There must have been thousands of children packed onto the floor. It was strange; in all of the instances they showed, there are rarely any adults, but everyone is organized and cooperates, makes space for people to sleep. No one cries. No one laughs. Everyone is too intent on just surviving.

There is, I think, a certain amount of desensitization that occurs when you live in a country where you can take the simplest things for granted. We see and hear things on the news about people dying all the time; it's become almost normal for people like me and my friends to hear about the Iraq war going badly and people dying. I usually don't give it a second thought. It makes me uncomfortable for a minute sometimes, but then I think, it's a world away, what can I really do. The moment passes, and I move on.

For the first time, I'm really feeling something like this hit me. The loss of any life is a terrible thing, and it's time that everyone wakes up to the realities of our times. Most of my friends brushed off the film like it was nothing, let the messages slide off them easily. I don't see how they can. This is too important to brush off. I feel for once something real should be done; I want to make things happen.

The good news is, something is being done. Schools all over the US have joined the Schools for Schools movement, in which students raise money to benefit schools K-12 all over northern Uganda to buy supplies, hire teachers, refurbish buildings, and more. Also, it's a great way to raise awareness. My highschool, Kamiak, is involved; that's how I came to see the film in the first place. Another movement taking place is Displace Me. This is a demonstration occuring in many cities on April 28 across America, where Americans are becoming displaced, and spending the night away from home outside in a simulated displacement camp. This is one way to raise awareness about the cause. During the event, testimonials will be given from those who have seen or been in the displacement camps, and attendees will be asked to write letters to their senators, encouraging peace talks and urging action. The third movement is the Tri Campaign, in which you can donate as little as 3$ a week to support the various . But this isn't all; there are more events that could be happening in your area, because of the Schools for Schools program. You just have to get involved, know what's going on.

Please, click on the links. Learn about Invisible Children. Education is the first step. I put up a couple banners on my sidebar, and I'll post all of these links on there as well.

Get informed. Take action. Make the world see these invisible children.

NATS

Well, another competition has come and gone. For those of you that don't know what NATS is, it stands for the National Association for Teachers of Singing. My teacher and his wife that also teaches singing, Gary and Sherri, are members, so they take part in judging competitors and have many of their own students compete. I entered into the Broadway category again this year, in which you sing two showtunes and on classical piece. My selections were Love, Look Away from Flower Drum Song, An Die Musik by Schubert, and Green Finch and Linnet Bird from Sweeney Todd. Green Finch was my favorite one; the composer, Stephen Sondheim, is amazing and the show, Sweeney Todd, is incredible.

Overall, I gave a good performance. My voice has matured considerably since last year, and I'm able to get through my passagio without as much resistance. Also, for the most part, I didn't lose control of my breathing. The two biggest issues for me when I perform for the judges (there were three again this year) or a small group are that I lose control of my breathing and I get tense, and also I just think way too hard about what I am doing. I do my best singing when I'm not concentrating on every little thing. When I do think about it too hard, I often mess up on little things like... oh, words. I got a couple bars of words wrong in two of my songs. I was able to stay with the music and pick it back up, and the whole time I was thinking, "No! What are you singing?! Just keep going, look happy, look like you are having a good time! Oh god!" Talk about stressful. But as far as big errors go, that was the only thing that really stuck out.

I usually hate watching my performance afterwards, because I cringe at every little thing and kick myself, because I know I can do better. But I still think I did a pretty good job, and I've made a lot of improvement over the past year.

The funny thing is, I don't nearly as nervous when performing in front of a large group. I used to in middle school; I'd get solos in choir and then perform at the choir concerts, and that was really nerve-wracking. But in the musicals, it's a piece of cake. But eventually it'll all be no problem. It just takes a few hundred tries.

I know next year will be even better.

Of all noises, I think music is the least disagreeable. -Samuel Johnson, English author, critic, & lexicographer (1709 - 1784)

Sick Sick Sick.

That is what I am. What an awful way to spend the first day of Spring; laying around with a pulsing headache and red throat, with only aspirin for comfort. And I am still sick the day after.

What is even more awful about this is that next week on Friday I have the NATS competition. Yes, it's that time of year again; I am much more prepared and bet it will be great, but my throat has to get better. If I talk too much I'm going to lose it and then I'll be screwed.

Anyway. I'll give a full report on the outcome of the competition when it's all over.

I don't think I've mentioned that I am, and have been for some time, considering Wicca as a good religion for me. I've been reading about it a lot over the past year, and the more I read the more I think it suits me. Yesterday I got to read a bit about Ostara, a Wiccan holiday celebrating Spring and the renewal of life, from one of my books, a work by Scott Cunningham. He's an excellent writer, and really makes Wicca easy to understand.

But I think that once I have some space to experiment with the religion, perhaps practice casting a circle and such, I'll be able to make a decision whether it is right for me.

Aside from that, there isn't a whole lot going on right now. I have to figure out what classes I'm taking at Everett Community College next year, since I'm doing Running Start. It's a program that my high school and the college have worked out so people in grades 11 or higher can go to community college for high school and college credit. I'm going to do it, but I have no idea how to figure out my classes or what to take, and it's just stressful. I'm not going to worry about it too much; I know it'll get done before the deadline, which is May 1st.

Well, that's all for now. I'll post again after the competition with lavish details.

It is a fine thing to establish one's own religion in one's heart, not to be dependent on tradition and second-hand ideals. Life will seem to you, later, not a lesser, but a greater thing. -D.H. Lawrence, English Novelist, 1885-1930

The Great Global Warming Swindle

A friend of mine emailed me this video - it certainly is intriguing. I tend to agree with it because the people giving the information are scientists, and don't have any political agendas, as far as I know. I've never seen An Inconvenient Truth and I don't know a lot of the science involved, but I think that this video gives an excellent analysis of what's going on in the world, and gives plausible reasoning for why people are behaving as they are and why the planet is behaving as it is.

It was originally shown on the BBC network, which is generally leftist, but this video doesn't contain any real bias. It's about an hour and fifteen minutes long, so watch it when you have some time.

If you can't watch the video here, go to YouTube and watch it there instead.

Turn It Off

I ran across a video on YouTube the other day promoting a website called www.shutdownday.org, and I gotta tell you, it's the best idea I've heard in a while. Shut Down Day, March 24th, is an internationally observed day for everyone to turn off their computers. No internet, no computer games, no instant messenger for 24 hours. The site has a forum, blog, and a few videos on YouTube that talk about it.

Here's a good one:



Just make sure the laptop is broken before you play ice hockey with it.

And another that someone made:



But there are some that don't so much agree with this idea. And if you read on their website some things people will do instead, some say they will be playing video games that day... not exactly taking advantage of the opportunity for extroversion. As someone who logs on to myspace everyday and HAS to check her email, it will be a challenge. But, I think it's an excellent idea, and I hope people do decide to shut down.

Also, on a related note, my mom told me that she was talking to our friend Kim from Nevada (I think it was Kim... perhaps I'm mistaken) about a sort of experiment in a classroom. The teacher told the college kids to see if they could go a week without being on their computers, video games, cell phones, everything. They said that was too harsh, so the assignment was set for four days.

Not one of them succeeded without cheating.

It's sad how dependent we are on technology... I'm a filthy hypocrite, seeing as I like my electric blanket at night and spend most of my time staring at the computer screen. But I do acknowledge that too much is not really a good thing.

On an even MORE related note, we are studying the Industrial Revolution in my World History class. Where our society could once survive without technology, now we are totally dependent. Where will we be in twenty years?

That's enough for today. I'm going outside.

Loose Change

I came across this website a few months ago; the movie Loose Change really opened my eyes. I would really recommed watching it.

I'm not usually one for conspiracy theories, but this really caught my attention. The evidence presented is compelling, and hard to find fault in.

Watch it and tell me what you think.

www.loosechange911.com

It's also the first link on my side bar, labeled 9/11 controversy.

OH MY GOODNESS.

I disappeared off the face of this earth for a few months. I haven't posted since August of last year... scary. It seems so long ago that summer had fallen over the land. I've been keeping busy, no worries about that; I'm a different person now than I was then, I think.

School is going absolutely swimmingly; I actually like it. I'm getting good grades, A's in pretty much everything except Biology. Totally boring. I'm not going to be a scientist or doctor or anything when I grow up, so it won't matter too much if I have a B+ in the class. My Earth and Space teacher last year talked me into taking Biology Honors because she said I had an aptitude for science. The difference was that I had a liking for some of the topics discussed in Earth and Space, and the teacher was excellent. This year, we talk about tiny things that are hard so small they are beyond my comprehension, and we take a million vocab quizzes and do lots and lots of busywork, worksheets and the like. We just finished talking about genetics a little and the possibilities that the future holds with that, as seen and dramaticized in the movie Gattaca, and that was really interesting. I like thinking about the future and how we what we do now affects it. But all the names of processes and things like that... that's why I don't like it. :/

I love my history class, though. It's my favorite class of all. School starts at 7:20 a.m., and World History is my first class. While everyone else is still dead tired and trying to wake up, I'm raising my hand and answering almost every question. It's great fun... although right now we are studying the Industrial Revolution, and I have studied that already in eighth grade... so it's a little boring at the moment. I've gotten a lot better at writing essays because of that class though.

High school is pretty easy right now. I'm just taking it as it comes. I'm also not letting myself be bogged down by other people's problems, like I did last year and in middle school. It's all palm trees and clear blue water for me right now.

Nothing too eventful is happening right now. I'm preparing for the next NATS competition, once again competing in the musical theatre category. I should do really well this year, now that I know better what to expect and so forth.

Anyway, just thought I'd check in. If I do or see anything worth mentioning, I'll post it and try to be more regular.

But until I write again....



Discuss.

A revolution without dancing is a revolution not worth having. -V, V for Vendetta

A Little Night Music

The musical this year has finally come to a close, with two performances on Friday and Sunday... and it was great. I've been away from the computer because rehearsals and all that has been exhausting, but now I am back to tell you all about my latest endeavor.

I am really proud of my performance... Last year I was so nervous about doing well, and about being in front of people, and this year it wasn't as bad. Instead of having butterflies of anxiety, it was more like restlessness and eagerness to be up on stage again. I can't wait until next year's musical, and I hope I get a bigger role... I want to have more solos, show people what I can really do.

The only thing that I didn't like about this year was the fact that the waltzers did the set changes. I was really bad at remembering where things went on stage, and I often put things in the wrong place. Sherri didn't want the stagehands, a few big guys, moving the set around because it would "ruin the tone". I do agree with Sherri on this, but it was really hard to find the marks to put things. Last week we did a tech rehearsal, and Tim, the stage manager, put down bright green one cm-by-one cm pieces of tape where our marks were, and he labeled them with sharpie which piece of furniture went on each mark. At first I thought this would be okay. But I didn't realize that during a blackout, it's pretty hard to find those little pieces of tape. Not to mention that my marks were muddled in with a bunch of other pieces of green tape, and that we had to moce the furniture as quickly and gracefully as we could without bumping into each other and without clunking on the floor. It was difficult, to say the least. I messed up a couple times on Friday and Sunday, and I got a little stressed out over it, but it wasn't too bad... I probably wouldn't want to do it again though.

Anyway. I felt best about Friday's performance, vocally and acting-wise, even though the light cues were a little screwy that day. That's okay. I just had a lot of energy that night and was totally confident that I could help put on a great show, and it was. Afterwards, we had the annual awards ceremony on stage, and I recieved the Bette Brookfield "Teacher's Pet" Award. I know how it sounds, but I'm not a suck up or anything... I think it's more about working hard and who Sherri and Gary have seen really doing well. At least, that's the jist of what Sherri said when she talked about it. She also said it's to honor her mother's memory, who was a great singer and performer.

Well, I suppose that's all for now. I'm going to put up some more pictures from the performance and some others now on The Haven, so I'll write again later.

Dreams come true. Without that possibility, nature would not incite us to have them. -John Updike

Humility

Humility

Chorus:

Don't cry

It's alright

I'll be there with you

Even if the sky's gone black

And though you can't see me

Just know that I hold your hand

So please don't cry

For me.

Verse I:

I know I never stayed at home

I know I was a whore

The things I thought were real to me

Are now the things I hate.

I was the one who needed help, I know,

As I pour myself a beer;

Drowning in myself I only pushed you away.

But the further I pushed, the harder you tried.

(And now I say)

(chorus repeat)

Verse II:
It seems that now the clocks are off,

Time seems to have stopped;

This I fear to be my fault:

I always slowed you down.

But even after you had gone

And I had found myself

I can't get time to move again

I'm in perpetual monotony

(And now I sing)

(chorus repeat)

(instrumental break)

Bridge:
It's getting late, I told you then, pulling on my coat;

A self induced, sick euphoria clouding up my brain.

A sardonic smile and a slurred goodbye was all it took

For you to start to cry for me.

(And now I cry)

(chorus repeat)

(c) Roxanna 2006

This picture is from the Pictures of Walls website.

After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music.

-Aldous Huxley

Of Music and Mortals.

Enjoy the Silence cover by Lacuna Coil


Check out Lacuna Coil

Words like violence
Break the silence
Come crashing in
Into my little world
Painful to me
Pierce right through me
Can't you understand
Oh my little girl

All I ever wanted
All I ever needed
Is here in my arms
Words are very unnecessary
They can only do harm

Vows are spoken
To be broken
Feelings are intense
Words are trivial
Pleasures remain
So does the pain
Words are meaningless
And forgettable

All I ever wanted
All I ever needed
Is here in my arms
Words are very unnecessary
They can only do harm

All I ever wanted
All I ever needed
Is here in my arms
Words are very unnecessary
They can only do harm

All I ever wanted
All I ever needed
Is here in my arms
Words are very unnecessary
They can only do harm

~~~~~

Of course, they could never outdo Depeche Mode, but I like how they did this song anyhow.

I don't have anything really exciting to talk about; I've been taking a lot of pictures, and I updated my photography blog, so you can check that out. I've resolved to carry my camera around with me everywhere, so that I am never left wishing I could have caught a moment. In the meantime, I've got to get to bed so I can get up early tomorrow. I am going with my sister to the ranch, then to the mall to get her ears pierced. It's weird to think that at eighteen she's only just now getting them done, but she never used to go for that kind of thing. It's kind of cool that she finally is.

I suppose I'll turn in.

Oh sleep! It is a gentle thing, Beloved from pole to pole. -Samuel Tayler Coleridge

Sailing!

I went sailing today, and it was amazing. My friend takes sailing lessons, and I was out for lunch with her when she suggested I join her in her lesson. I thought at first I wouldn't be able to, figuring I'd need a parental unit to sign a safety waiver, and seeing how my mom was at work, that wouldn't work. However, the instructor was a little lax about that, so I was able to get on a boat in the lesson. I'm not really at risk for an accident, anyway; I'm a strong swimmer, and did take scuba training for open water certification... although I'm not certified. But whatever. I was feeling a little apprehensive at first, because I thought I'd get frustrated or confused on what I was supposed to do, and both my friend and the instructor kept overloading me with information to remember. Once I got on the water, however, it was easy. Just hold onto the tiller, keep the boomsheet rope semi-taut, and catch the wind. I learned what 'tack' and 'jibe' meant, tack being when you sail into the eye of the wind with the bow and jibe when you sail into the wind with the stern. At least, I think that's correct... some of the information I'm not sure I remember correctly. What was more interesting was that at the end of the lesson, after we put the boats (we were sailing little seven-foot lasers by ourselves-really cool, except you have to duck if the boom comes swinging around on a jibe and there isn't a lot of head room) away, the teacher taught us about the physics of how the wind affects the sail and how fast you go. She had prompted the class with a question about why you don't go as fast if all the wind just blows straight into the sail, and you don't let the wind blow streamlined through the sail. No one had an answer, so she explained it. It works in the same way an airplane wing does; above the wing, the wind blows across and creates pressure, also creating lift. The wind underneath the wing creates high pressure, and also pull. You need both for the plane to stay up, and move forward in the easiest and fastest way. So, when the wind blows over the rounded part of the sail, it creates lift, and when it passes through the other side, it creates pull, and makes everything streamlined.

I think that stuff is pretty interesting, but the best part was being out there on the lake in that boat... talk about freedom! We used to have a 27' Catalina when I was five, but I used to get scared, because sometimes it would be really choppy, and I'd freak out that the boat would flip over... I didn't know a whole lot back then. We ended up having to sell it, because my Mom and Dad were the only ones who really enjoyed it. Plus, my sister used to get really seasick... puking over the side the whole time. Not fun. But once my dad finishes school, we can get a boat again, and I'll go sailing with him. That I would enjoy.

Learning to sail was pretty much the highlight of my day... I'll have to go back and see how much it costs to take lessons. Being out on the water made me think of my friend Kim, who lives in Las Vegas and has a sailboat on Lake Tahoe. Maybe I should go down there and go sailing with her.

I find the great thing in this world is not so much where we stand, as in what direction we are moving: To reach the port of heaven, we must sail sometimes with the wind and sometimes against it, but we must sail, and not drift, nor lie at anchor. -Oliver Wendell Holmes

The Haven

I added a blog to my account called The Haven. It's a place to put all the pictures I take and collect that I don't put on here.

In addition to that...

...I have been thinking about joining the AFROTC (Air Force Reserve Officers' Training Corps). For the life of me, I don't know why. The idea is just appealing to me, although in my heart I know I'm not meant for the military lifestyle. I'm too much of a thinker... not enough of an empty vessel for their "I own your ass" ideals. Plus, my fantasy of becoming a musician would become pretty much completely extinguished if I abandoned it to go play soldier. Maybe I'm just romanticizing the military. It's not all that romantic, I know... One of Dean's friends, John, was talking to us about his experiences as a pilot in the Air Force, and it isn't all that glorious. He's had a fulfilling life, but some of the consequences seem a bit unsavory. For example, he has a constant buzzing in his ears because of the guns and bombs and stuff going on around him. Not exactly great. I'm just not that excited to have to be in a combat zone... if I was stationed somewhere that wasn't a warzone, then that would be fine, but I don't think I'd be able to hack it under those circumstances.

Other than that, I've got the musical to concern myself with. I've gotten my parts down to where I don't really need to focus on them a whole lot. I still practice at home, but during my lessons, we don't really work on it anymore, because I just don't need to. So we work on other things, like one of my German pieces, An Die Musik. It's coming along nicely.

Today I didn't do a whole lot; mostly set up The Haven, messed around with my myspace template, and went out in my front yard to take some pictures of stuff. I have some gorgeous yellow and white roses growing through the weeds (which , due to my mothers' and my efforts, are receding slowly), so I took a couple pictures of them.

I'll probably update The Haven later, putting on some recent pictures. My camera has the capability to record up to an hour of film as well with excellent quality, but both Youtube and Myspace won't upload them for me... The files are too big, or some such rot. The films themselves are all less than five minutes long, so I don't know why they won't upload... I'll have to investigate and find another way to get them online.

Our houses are such unwieldy property that we are often imprisoned rather than housed in them. -Henry David Thoreau

Speeding up and slowing down.

Lots has been going on in my life recently, so I've been doing a lot of random writing and living, and not a whole lot of blogging. So excuse the abscence.

I can tell you that what has been taking up most of my time is music. We started working on this year's musical about a month ago, and this year we are doing A Little Night Music. I am one of the waltzers, whose job is to act as the muses in the story, guiding the plot as the principal characters generally make a mess of themselves. The story is essentially about people falling in and out of love at the turn of the 20th century, and humor and passion run rampant. It's going to be a wonderful show, and the cast this year is excellent. By the way, this whole production is put together courtesy of my voice teacher and his wife, who also gives lessons. They usually have two shows, and second show being put together is a show called You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown, which is something of a little more childish nature, but sounds like is going to be an excellent show as well.

Anyways, apart from that, I've been enjoying myself. I go up to Dean's ranch occasionally with Adrianna, while other days I spend writing, practicing guitar or piano, singing, walking down to the park, and cleaning. Yes, I said cleaning... we Washingtonians have to be prepared for lazy, rainy days, even in summer. You eventually think you've run out of things to do, but then something presents itself.

To tell you the truth, for the past week, I've been caught in a slump. I've lost some of my stamina, I'm afraid, and I can be found lying on the the couch channel surfing instead of actually doing something. Maybe it's the streak of bad weather we've been having; who knows. I suppose I shouldn't be making excuses for myself. And while it is easy to just get up at noon and sleep the day away, it's not very useful or productive.

So there's my bit of scolding.

I guess I haven't been doing all that much. I'm thinking about getting back the job I had last summer, which was watching a woman's children for her. That's probably the hardest job there is, besides defusing bombs and commercial tuna fishing. That's the solution for the teen pregnancy problem: make all teenage girls babysit two children under the age of 8 for three months, and then ask them if they want to have sex. If the answer is yes, then they MUST be insane (or a commercial fisherman). The consequences are too harsh, yes indeed.

But the attraction of the job wasn't the children, though I have to admit, the youngest one was only a year old, and could be adorable at times... when she wasn't neck deep in crap and screaming. No, I really had a fascination with the money it brought in. That's how I bought my car; by the end of the summer, I bought a car for $800 off Adrianna's friend. It's not exactly gorgeous, and it does have a few things wrong with it, but it's a car, and I do have a certain amount of pride for it. So, I guess it's kind of like a practical husband; not exactly Heath Ledger, and does leave the toilet seat up, but hey! You love him anyway, right?

I've been watching WAY too much Comedy Central. Ha.

Right now, it's pretty late, so I think I'm going to leave it here and type more tomorrow, so I can get some sleep.

“In rock ‘n’ roll, you’re built up to be torn down. Like architecture in America, you build it up and let it stand for ten years, then call it shabby and rip it down and put something else up.” -Joni Mitchell

The Kentucky Derby

Yesterday was derby day, and it was great... Barbaro certainly is an amazing horse. I've got an article from the Washington Post that covers the derby pretty well, so I'll post it here.


Barbaro Breaks Away
Prado Rides Undefeated Colt to Victory by 61/2 Lengths, the Largest Margin in 60 Years

By John Scheinman
Special to The Washington Post
Sunday, May 7, 2006; Page E01


LOUISVILLE, May 6 -- Throughout the Kentucky Derby prep races, jockey Edgar Prado kept his options open regarding who he might ride in the big race. Even after he guided Barbaro to victory in the Florida Derby, Prado said he thought the undefeated colt was a better runner on turf than dirt.

On Saturday, Prado found out Barbaro just might be better on dirt after all. Much better.

Galloping like a powerful machine on the far turn, Barbaro pulled away from one of the deepest Kentucky Derby fields in years, winning America's signature horse race by 6 1/2 lengths, the largest margin since Assault's win in 1946.

Tracking leaders Keyed Entry and Sinister Minister after a brief stumble at the start, Barbaro moved easily to the front when those horses tired at the five-sixteenths pole and effortlessly through the stretch to win in a fast time of 2 minutes 1.36 seconds.

Prado did little more than shake his reins in the stretch as late-running long shots Bluegrass Cat and Steppenwolfer vainly tried to catch up.

Barbaro became the sixth undefeated horse in 132 years to win the Kentucky Derby. For Prado, who rose to stardom in the 1980s riding at Laurel Park and Pimlico, it was his first Derby victory in seven tries.

"I looked back a couple times and saw nobody," Prado said. "The horse up front started dying a little bit. It was just a matter of time before I turned him loose."

Sweetnorthernsaint, the Laurel Park-based horse who received a rush of late betting money to go off as the 5-1 favorite in the field of 20, made a threatening move on the inside on the far turn but lacked his usual power in the stretch and faded to seventh.

Prado rode Barbaro into the winner's circle, pumping his fists at the crowd of 108,065, the second largest in Derby history.

For Barbaro's trainer Michael Matz, 55, who bases most of his horses at the Fair Hill Training Center in Maryland, the victory vindicated his plans from the beginning of Barbaro's campaign.

The colt was bred to be a star grass runner and won the first three races of his career on the turf, including the Laurel Futurity on Nov. 19. But Matz -- a former star equestrian rider who carried the U.S. flag at the Closing Ceremonies of the 1996 Olympics -- believed he had a horse that could win the Kentucky Derby.

He took Barbaro to Florida and won the Holy Bull Stakes over a sloppy track and then the Florida Derby on April 1 by a half-length. After the race, Prado said he still wanted to ride Strong Contender in the Blue Grass Stakes before deciding who to ride in the Kentucky Derby.

Much was made in the weeks leading up to the Kentucky Derby of Matz's decision to train Barbaro up to the race off a five-week layoff. No horse had won the Derby off such a long rest since Needles in 1956.

"What can I say?" said a vindicated Matz, the fourth consecutive trainer to win the Derby in his first attempt. "Everybody saw it. They know what he did. We never missed anything in his training. We never wavered on our plan. [Assistant trainer] Peter [Brett] assured me five weeks would not be a problem. There were a lot of good horses today, but it was his race today."

The good horses had trouble keeping up. Keyed Entry, who finished last, broke quickly from the inside and seized the lead from Sinister Minister, the fastest of three runners from the barn of Bob Baffert, and ran through the first half-mile in a sizzling 46.07 seconds.

As the exhausted front-runners fell away on the turn and Barbaro attacked, only Sweetnorthernsaint and Bluegrass Cat made significant challenges to win. Lawyer Ron, who had won six straight races, faded to 12th. The other two Baffert runners, Point Determined and Bob and John, finished ninth and 17th, respectively. Brother Derek, the early consensus favorite, raced wide on both turns and wound up in a dead heat with Jazil for fourth place.

Bluegrass Cat, a forgotten colt who once had been considered among the top 3-year-olds in the country, rebounded from his dismal 21 1/4 -length loss in the Blue Grass Stakes, his final prep for the Derby.

Barbaro is raced by his breeders, Roy and Gretchen Jackson of West Grove, Pa., and the couple had a tremendous day. Besides winning the Derby with Barbaro and finishing sixth with their other entrant, Showing Up, the couple bred the European champion colt George Washington, who earlier in the day won the historic Two Thousand Guineas Stakes at Newmarket in England.

Gretchen Jackson said she had wanted to win the Kentucky Derby since she was a little girl.

"I've personally thought about the Kentucky Derby since Whirlaway [won in 1941]," she said. "As a little girl, I had a picture book about Whirlaway that I just loved, so this is a dream come true." -WP

It was fun to watch. I was up at the farm when it came on, and John and Mary (some of Dean's friends and nice people) came over to watch as well. We all had our bets, but none of us picked the winner. Mary did pick Bluegrass Cat, the longshot, to win; well, the Cat got second, and that's close enough.

Today my sister and I are going back up to Dean's; his friends from Phucket, Cliff and his girlfriend Noi, are supposed to be coming in from Europe today, so it should be good to meet them; I hope to meet them, anyway. They were originally supposed to arrive yesterday, but Dean thinks that Cliff may have gotten it wrong with the time difference when he spoke to him.

I'll write more later.


"Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming:
WOW--What a Ride!" -anonymous

The Rain... Alive.

Where do we go now?
Hazy clouds seem to blur the path, so not even I know.
All that I know is stumbling-slipping-tumbling-sliding
Down towards the ground.
That is our destination, is it not?
Fate leads us, sometimes by the hand or kicked along, to one place.

Just when we feel in control-

We smack into one side of a catastrophe.

Lost.

Confused.

And still falling.

Do we stop to ask why?

Nothing comes of speculation,

Because for all the meticulous collection and analyzation,

We always seem to come up-

Short.

Dissatisfaction pulsing through aching and, inevitably,

Young minds.

The best choice, seemingly, is to let things be, to simply fall...

But what a wondrous thing...

To fly through the air.

Why should all things be in despair?

Letting the breeze dash you past trees,

To come and rest gently on their leaves,

Until again you are left breathless by another swift gust,

Sweeping by the tallest castles and fountains,

Imaginary princesses and knights and dragons filling your mind,

Passing through dream after dream until you finally see,

Yes.

This is what everything is about;

This is how it's meant to be.

I am alive.

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away. -unknown author

A beautiful day

Today was another great day; the weather was sunny and pleasantly warm all day, with a slight breeze picking up later in the evening. I went out with my mom and dad to Dean's place, where Adrianna was staying for the weekend. She had a lesson today around 1 in the afternoon with a good trainer named BJ. Adrianna and Jack had a good lesson, Jack worked hard and I think BJ and Adrianna were both pleased. Afterwards, I soothed my hunger with something from Anne's kitchen (she always has something good to eat, haha... there is no shortage of good things there).

I went for a ride later with my dad, him riding Spicy and myself riding Dean's mule, Scooter. Scooter is a good, sound animal; she's really push-button broke, and I had a good ride on her. My dad took the camera up on top, so I've got a few pictures to show:

Here's some of when we got back:

Here's Adrianna on the tractor, doing the routine work:

My mom took me home while my dad and Adrianna stayed, and my mom told me she had been working a bit in the backyard. Our backyard really is something else, because it has great potential to be beautiful, yet it is completely overgrown. You can see where there are concrete steps leading down into a sort of "haven", yet to get there you have to somehow wend your way through thick blackberry vines and through the branches of trees weighted down with branches. Anyway, she told me that she'd been clearing away some of the weeds and had lain down some bark underneath one of our old, tall evergreen trees. An old-fashioned bench sits there, and I believe she is clearing the weeds away from there with the partial intent of giving me a place to write, and for this I'm thankful; I've been yearning for somewhere to go write that isn't in the confines of a building.

I'll have to take some pictures of our yard sometime this week... some of my garden project in the front yard, and some of the overcrowded backyard. It's late though right now, and I have to get up for school tomorrow, so I'll say goodbye for now.

"If I know a song of Africa, of the giraffe and the African new moon lying on her back, of the plows in the fields and the sweaty faces of the coffee pickers, does Africa know a song of me? Will the air over the plain quiver with a color that I have had on, or the children invent a game in which my name is, or the full moon throw a shadow over the gravel of the drive that was like me, or will the eagles of the Ngong Hills look out for me?" -Karen Blixen/Isak Dineson, Out of Africa

Of this and that

I just thought I'd share some lovely pictures of my sister and her horse Jack up at Dean and Anne's thoroughbred ranch in Granite Falls. She went up there the other day, and my dad got some really good shots of her jumping. Isn't Jack flashy? My family all call him Bodacious Jack.

Enough of that for now. I haven't written in a while, so I'll get up to date with what's been taking up my time.

Near the end of March, the day after my singing competition, I went out with my mother in the gorgeous weather to meet up with my sister. She was at the ranch already, tending to the horses and doing the chores that she normally does, like helping the ranch hand Eduvides clean stalls and such. Once there, Adrianna told me that Charles, Dean's son and a racehorse trainer, was taking some horses and people up to the tree farm in Arlington, including Adrianna, and she asked if I wanted to go. I went ahead and got my horse Spicy (my Arabian/Saddlebred mix, a pretty 17 yr. old cinnamon-chestnut mare) and we hauled up to the tree farm.

The ride that ensued was absolutely amazing. I did have a bit of trouble with Spicy, because she pulled on the bit a lot (natl. show horses are pretty hot, and Spicy always jigs around, pulling on me to let her extend and trot), and I didn't have a stable seat, because I was using a dressage saddle instead of my standard comfortable western saddle. It was great to go out and ride with everybody though, because I don't get many opportunities to go to the tree farm.

Here's some more pictures so you can see what Spicy looks like:

Poor Spicy. The baby horses in her pastures chewed up her tail a while ago.. it used to drag on the ground, but no more. It'll grow back, eventually.

What else of significance? Well, I can talk about seeing the movie V for Vendetta. Now, THAT is a good movie. I really enjoyed it (I guess that was a given, though, because I'm really into the negative utopia stuff like 1984 and Fahrenheit 451), and Hugo Weaving as V and Natalie Portman as Evey were really good choices. I definitely recommend it.

HOWEVER.

For all you die hard fans of the comic, you may not be as impressed as I was. The message is not the same as it was in the comic, because Alan Moore and David Lloyd's creation portrays the mysterious V as an anarchist. I read the comic after I saw the movie, so it kind of skewed the message that I originally got. Plus, there are quite a few things that they left out, but that's to be expected from a book-to-movie production anyway. But aside from all that, I think the movie was very well done, and I loved it anyway. It's my favorite movie at the moment. My sister believes that this movie would have done better financially if it had come out before The Matrix trilogy, and I agree with her; the storylines have the same kind of idea, even if The Matrix is a little more sci fi.

Because of this movie, and some other events, I have taken up an interest in political science. I just want to become more knowledgeable, so I can escape the strange, twisted version of today's politics that my peers have. Plus, I want to be able to better recognize political bias online and in other places, so that I don't fall into trusting something that isn't credible.

Away from the weighty topics, I've been interested in renovating a garden in my front yard. It's going to be a big project, as it's completely over-grown with weeds, with haphazardly growing roses in the middle, and a muddle of other flowers that are being choked. I've decided I need something else as a focus, something that's relaxing and outside, so that I can soak up a little sunshine and do something productive, for those days that I can't go up to the ranch.

Also, I've been trying to write some more. After my huckleberrying assignment for my english class that involved observing things and people, more specifically school and how I learn, I've been inspired to just keep a journal for just the purpose of observation. I used to do that in seventh grade, but I've lost the habit. I figured some journaling and observation would do me good as a writer, so I went to Barnes and Noble and bought a black, pocket-sized leather-bound notebook. I've already taken some things down, mostly notes, and a random dialogue that I came up with. A good story could come out of it.

Now, let me tell you the strangest thing; the other night, I wrote the dialogue before I went to bed, and then in a sort of semi-conscious haze, I had a 'dream' about my dialogue. Well, not really about the dialogue; it was more like the childhood of the person the dialogue is about. I knew that it was him, the main character, because I kept thinking to myself (my dream was in a third person view) "THAT'S him! That is who the story is about." It was probably the strangest thing I've ever experienced, because I've fallen asleep with more pertinent things on my mind and not thought about them at all. I'm thankful for it really, because it was a great source of insight; I was actually able to see my character vividly, his habits, and his personality. I suppose my muse is trying to take a more active role in my writing, ha. Maybe this means I should be writing more, and live up to the quote at the bottom of my site.

That's pretty much all that's been going on with me. I'll try to get more regular with my posts, because I know that no one likes to come and see the same old posts with no changes.

Oh, and remember: today is Earth Day. Do something that will help to better the environment, your checkbook, and your life. It's not that hard to turn off a light, unplug the TV (I know it's a gorgeous day where I am), unplug your cell phone charger, or simply take a day off from your stresses and take a walk outside. It's just a good idea to keep in mind that we all make an impact on our surroundings, and the little things really do count.

Goodbye for now, I'll write more later on.

"A revolution without dancing is a revolution not worth having." -V, V for Vendetta

The NATS competition

I just got back from my first singing competition around nine, and it went pretty well. I mean, there were things that could have been a lot better, and I know I could have done better, but being the first solo I've ever done I'm not too disappointed.

The atmosphere, however, was a bit... well, I didn't like it particularly. First of all, the woman at the front desk talked to me like I was about 2 years old when I was registering, and it felt like she didn't want to deal with anyone. That put me off a little. And then, in the room where I performed, there was this weird tension in the air and I got this really interesting vibe from the three judges; like they could tell I was a rookie, or something like that... it was a bit unnerving.

Other than that, I felt pretty relaxed during my performance; I was a little anxious, but compared to my other solo experiences I thought I did rather well. I did go flat or sharp a few times in my first piece, Goodnight my Someone; but I know that was due to air pressure, nothing out of my control; and that was probably due to nerves, because I have performed this piece flawlessly before. Lachen und Weinen, my second piece, went really well, except for again a problem with air pressure that made me go a bit flat. My last piece, however, was kind of sloppy because my accompanist (wonderful woman, and a really talented pianist) got off the music while playing; she lost her place, I think, and I got ahead of her, of course making a mess of that section. But it ended up being okay, because I just kept going and she was able to pick right back up at where I was. I don't really blame her for making that mistake, though, because the music for that piece (Another Hundred People from Stephen Sondheim's musical Company) is ridiculously hard and fast, way beyond anything I would ever dream of trying. Plus, when I photocopied the music for her and sent it to her, the music didn't copy well and when she read it she thought the timing was a quarter note to 116 instead of a half note to 116, so that of course made her think that the piece was really slow paced, like a love song, which it isn't at all... so until we met for the first time two weeks ago to practise it, she had already been playing it for a week or so at a really slow tempo. It was really hard to get us together on the piece, I mean the piano part and the vocal part, so I'm happy about the performance, and I'm glad that it went as well as it did, even if there was a small mistake.

So all in all, it was a very rewarding experience, and I'm sure that the more I compete the more accustomed I'll become to the environment and all that.

Nothing more really to add, so I'll talk more later.

"But then there's a moment like tonight, a profound and transcendent experience, the feeling as if a door has opened, and it's all because of that instrument, that incredible, magical instrument." - Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider, Northern Exposure, Mite Makes Right, 1994.

Would you look at that..

This is my blog. I used to have one, but I neglected it, so I just decided to make a new account and a new blog and start all over.

It's a blog for anything really, poetry, musings, journaling, anything. It's a place to rest on the way to search for my Walden.

(I love Thoreau, by the way.)

So join me among the twisting brambles of the huckleberry patch... I hear the ripest lay just beyond our reach.